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Government Screws Me

Friday, September 26, 2008 by Michael Reynolds

This sucks. The federal government seized WaMu. Which is great!

Then they handed it off to JP Morgan. What the hell is that about?

I have a mortgage with WaMu on the house I can't sell in Chapel Hill. Had the federal government simply seized WaMu and held onto it, then, basically, as a taxpayer, I'd have owed my mortgage payment to myself.

I would have been fine with that. I could have written myself a check each month and then deposited it right back into the account. Now I suppose those people at JP Morgan will expect me to pay them.

Thanks federal government. Thanks a lot.

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Krauthammer: Blame the Negroes

by Michael Reynolds

Who is to blame for the financial disaster that threatens the unthinkable? A Democrat in the White House?

Turns out, it's not Wall Street. And it's not the anti-regulation GOP. And it's not the Republican president who's been in power for 8 years.

You'll never guess who is really to blame. Turns out: it's the Negroes.

I have little doubt that some, if not many, cases of malfeasance will emerge. But what we conveniently neglect is the fact that much of this crisis was brought upon us by the good intentions of good people.

For decades, starting with Jimmy Carter's Community Reinvestment Act of 1977, there has been bipartisan agreement to use government power to expand homeownership to people who had been shut out for economic reasons or, sometimes, because of racial and ethnic discrimination. What could be a more worthy cause? But it led to tremendous pressure on Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac -- who in turn pressured banks and other lenders -- to extend mortgages to people who were borrowing over their heads. That's called subprime lending. It lies at the root of our current calamity.
It's confusing because usually in situations like this when the rich, powerful white people fuck something up and need a scapegoat it's the Jews who turn out to be responsible.

I mean, what's up with that? What, are Jews no longer capable of manipulating the world? Why am I even bothering to attend the secret weekly meeting? Suddenly African-Americans are in charge of the vast worldwide conspiracy?

Anyway, I guess we shouldn't be surprised. There's almost nothing that Negroes and Liberals aren't to blame for. There's no conceivable way Wall Street billionaires, the ruling party and the President of the United States could be held responsible. Clearly. I mean, you really have to be crazy not to see that the fault lies with working class black people trying to buy homes.

I'm just saying: I think there have got to be some Jews in there somewhere. I'm feeling just a bit dissed, quite frankly.

Once again I will repeat: there is literally no bottom to the GOP barrel.

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Not Inexperienced: Stupid.

Thursday, September 25, 2008 by Michael Reynolds

She's an ignoramus. That much we know. But now we can add the fact that she's evidently un-teachable.

COURIC: You've cited Alaska's proximity to Russia as part of your foreign policy experience. What did you mean by that?

PALIN: That Alaska has a very narrow maritime border between a foreign country, Russia, and on our other side, the land-- boundary that we have with-- Canada. It-- it's funny that a comment like that was-- kind of made to-- cari-- I don't know, you know? Reporters--


PALIN: Yeah, mocked, I guess that's the word, yeah.

COURIC: Explain to me why that enhances your foreign policy credentials.

PALIN: Well, it certainly does because our-- our next door neighbors are foreign countries. They're in the state that I am the executive of. And there in Russia--

COURIC: Have you ever been involved with any negotiations, for example, with the Russians?

PALIN: We have trade missions back and forth. We-- we do-- it's very important when you consider even national security issues with Russia as Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where-- where do they go? It's Alaska. It's just right over the border. It is-- from Alaska that we send those out to make sure that an eye is being kept on this very powerful nation, Russia, because they are right there. They are right next to-- to our state.

You know the McCain handlers must have been all over the governor trying desperately to bring her up to speed. They've had weeks. This is where she is? This is her grade level? This is Beavis and Butthead trying to fake their way through foreign policy 101.

Would you people ever, for a moment, tolerate this level of abject ignorance from me? From anyone you read? This bimbo wants to be one 72 year-old heartbeat away from the White House? Are you kidding me? I could smack this nitwit around for hours on foreign policy. And I'm a kid's book writer. I write about 14 year-olds with superpowers, for God's sake. I'm a high school drop-out. And not only do I know more than this woman does, I can assimilate information far faster. Give me a few weeks with McCain's brain trust and I could throw down with Kissinger.

Does that not frighten you? You want a president dumber than me?

This isn't about "experience." She's a nincompoop. She's a nitwit. She's incapable of faking her way through basic questions. Oh My God: she's an idiot.

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Ladies and Gentlemen: Sarah Palin

by Michael Reynolds

Sarah Palin's interview with Katie Couric.

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The Downside of Sobriety

Wednesday, September 24, 2008 by Michael Reynolds

Record surpluses become record deficits.
Iraq war botched.
New Orleans drowns.
Afghanistan war botched.
The US joins list of nations that practice torture.
Our Pakistani "ally" is tossed out.
The Russians slap Georgia around.
North Korea pops a bomb and then weasels.
The economy melts down.
Osama still lives.

Just think of how much better off the world might be if George W. Bush had just kept drinking.

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