I need more polls.
I'm not kidding here, I need me some polls. Sweet, sweet polls.
Pennsylvania, Virginia, North Carolina, Colorado, New Mexico, Ohio, Florida. Did I mention Pennsylvania? POOOOOOOLLLS!
Rasmussen, Gallup, Mason Dixon, Hotline, ARG, Marist, Strategic Vision, CNN, NYT, WashingtonPost/ABC, WSJ/NBC. POOOOOOLLLLLLLS! POOOOOOOOLLLLLLS!
I'm tying off, man. I got my works out. Oh yeah, baby. Come on, right here, right in the vein. Oh yeah . . . so good . . . so . . . Oh, man, somebody ripped me off with some weak-ass, stepped-on Zogby! No way, that's not going to do it. I'm jonesing bad, I can't be getting by on Zogby!
Okay, don't panic. Don't panic.
Pollster.com will hook me up. What? Nothing new? Okay, talk to me
RCP, you have to be holding. I need a fix, man, you can't cut me off like this.
Fivethirthyeight, you know I love you, you know I'll do anything for you. Anything. You know what I'm saying? I just need me some poll. Daddy needs it bad.
You got
what? A California poll? What the f**k am I gonna do with a California poll? Are you kidding me? At least give me a taste of some Montana or Indiana.
Anybody? Can anyone help me? I just need something to get me by. Honest to God, I'm going to get cleaned up. I swear. In like a couple of days. But right now man, right now I need some random sampling.
I need it. So bad.